Blog
Support For Individuals, Couples, & Families
Heal your deep emotional wounds – God’s way
Holistic Biblical Counselling
Can God help me with my addiction problem? ( Part 2)
We tend to keep making the same mistakes over and over again is because we are not intentional about the learning from our mistakes. When it comes to making the same mistakes, you have to ask yourself if you really, truly want to change, and are willing to work hard and face yourself.
If you are not fully committed to your change,
You will find every excuse not to change.
Change can, of course, also be uncomfortable. To overcome this pain, we have to want to change.
Change happens through crisis. God changed Jacob’s name, which means “deceiver,” to Israel, which means “a prince with God.” And He did it through crisis. Realizing he had to go home and face the wrath of his brother Esau, whom he’d mistreated, Jacob became desperate. That night in his tent he wrestled with the angel of the Lord. And the change in his life didn’t come quickly or easily, because we’re told he wrestled until daybreak.
But suddenly it dawned on Jacob that he was wrestling with God, and it was a fight he couldn’t win. Likewise, God will let you wrestle with an issue you can’t resolve, to get your attention. He’ll bring you to the place where you must concede, “I can’t handle this situation. It’s too big for me. I need God!” If that’s where you are today, you’re on the cusp of a breakthrough.
If you’re asking God to make you comfortable in the mess you’re in, forget it – it’s not going to happen. “As an eagle stirs up its nest… so the Lord alone led him” (Deuteronomy 32:11-12). A mother eagle will upend her nest and push her children off a cliff to teach them how to fly.
Can you imagine what they’re thinking? “It’s my mother doing this to me!” And God will do the same to you. He’ll allow a crisis in order to get your attention. He knows you won’t change until your fear of change is surpassed by the pain you’re experiencing.
Bottom line: “The Lord – who is the Spirit – makes us more and more like him as we are changed into his glorious image.”
Between stimulus and response there is a space. In this space lies our freedom to choose our response. In those choices lie our growth and our happiness. Victor Frank
Are you desperate enough to stop making the same mistakes over and over again?
If you answered yes to the above, then you are ready to stop making those mistakes!
Bear this in mind when you are ready for a positive change:
1. Know it takes time to change.
It takes a minimum of 63 days to change an automated habit—when it comes to the mind, there really are no quick fixes and most people give up on day 4, so be patient!
2. Be intentional about learning from the mistake.
Be intentional about your learning process: make sure you have a plan in place for next time you fail, and how you can avoid making the same mistake in the future. learn from your experiences, as opposed to just reacting to them.
3. Become aware of your thoughts, mistakes, triggers and bodily reactions.
Ask yourself why you react in that way, what is happening in your environment, how you can change the situation and how your mindset is affecting your ability to deal with the situation.
4. Have a plan of action ready when things fail.
When dealing with a situation or life in general, it is best to spend a limited amount of time of defining what the issue is, and focus more on a plan of action to improve the situation. Change your consciousness.
5. It is good idea keeping a thought journal.
Writing is a great way to bring clarity to a situation, and help us become aware of our mistakes and how we can change them. For 21 days (roughly the time it takes to start building a new mental habit), take note of when you are triggered, what has caused you to make the mistake, the frequency of the mistakes and how you think you can start to intentionally change the way you react to these triggers.
6. Be aware of others & how they react.
How are you reacting to the people in your life, and how do they react to you? Be intentional about observing how you speak and act within the context of your relationships.
7. Understand why change is important.
We will never change unless we understand why it is important that we change. Think about and write down why you think it is important that you change, how the mistake is affecting your relationships and why you want to change the way you are acting. Remind yourself of this when you feel like giving up, or you feel like you cannot change.
8. Using the bouncing technique, it is effective.
When you have a constant struggle with urging to use, break this toxic thought pattern by slapping yourself on the wrist with an elastic band you constantly wear around your wrist. The pain you experience will immediately change your consciousness away from the urge thought. It proves to be a very effective method.
9. Seek Godly help, if you can’t get victory on your own!
It is important to have accountability partner to help you, one you can phone when you help. Sometimes we need other people to pray with us and to put their trust with yours for a breakthrough. It can be a Christian counselor, or a therapist. IT IS NOT A SIGN OF WEAKNESS OR UNBELIEF OR SIN. SEEK HELP.